"The Entertainment Circle Is My [Rebirth]" Exclusively published by Jinjiang

——Text: Spring Daohan

Written at the beginning: The copywriting of this article began in December 2018. Weibo has a timeline that is self-certified. There is no prototype. Please do not substitute. I bow ninety degrees to thank everyone.

【01】

For a long time after Cen Feng's death, Xu Zhaixing had the same dream.

The boy in the dream was sitting in a closed room, reading a book, while the charcoal at his feet burned silently, swallowing up the last of the oxygen. Xu Zhaixing stood outside the door, beating the invisible door with all his strength.

But there was nothing she could do.

Cen Feng looked up, smiled at her, and then threw the book into the fire pot, where the flames licked up. Xu Zhaixing watched helplessly as he was being swallowed, and then woke up crying, his whole body shaking with pain.

Cen Feng has been gone for half a year.

In the past six months, Cen Feng's name has been rarely mentioned in the entertainment industry where news is constantly coming out. Even when he just passed away, his news dominated the headlines of major portals for a whole week, as if the whole world was being unfair to him.

At that time, all her friends who knew that she liked Cen Feng came to comfort her.

They repeated everything that happened to Cen Feng. They not only sympathized with him, but also sympathized with his fans. Finally, they told Xu Zhaixing to be more open-minded. After all, he was just an idol who said, "You and I have no chance to be together, and we all rely on me to spend money."

.

Xu Zhaixing, who had fought for Cen Feng before, didn't refute anything.

People are always forgetful. Netizens who denounced Cen Feng disappeared due to capital interference. Even his fans had new idols. Gradually, Xu Zhaixing stopped mentioning him, as if he had never tried his best.

I loved a boy.

But sometimes, she would be in a daze, and when she reacted, tears would flow down her face.

A colleague asked her: "Zhaixing, what's wrong with you?"

What's up with her?

She didn't know, she just felt her heart hurt, as if a piece of it had been cut out by a knife.

…

It started to rain lightly in the evening, and Aunt Zhu, the nanny who was taking care of Xu's father, called, "Zhaixing, are you coming back for dinner? I made chicken soup for your dad."

Xu Zhaixing dragged the makeup box down the stairs: "I'm going to do makeup tonight. The bride's home is in the suburbs and she won't be back. You and dad can eat together. By the way, Aunt Zhu, my classmate purchased the express box downstairs from abroad.

Honey, you take it and mix it into a bowl for Dad, and feed it to him before going to bed."

Aunt Zhu agreed and hung up the phone.

Xu's father has been paralyzed in bed since he suffered a stroke seven years ago. In the early years, Xu Zhaixing took care of him personally. In the past two years, her career has improved and she made some money, so she hired a nanny for Xu's father.

It wasn't raining heavily, so she dragged her makeup case to the street and took a taxi.

While waiting at the traffic light, a woman holding her child was talking on the phone next to her: "I have already handed in the second-phase financial statements. How can I change the budget now? Mr. Chen has already passed the approval!"

She was holding the child and holding the umbrella. She couldn't hold the phone steadily, so she simply put the little girl down in her arms, "It's useless for you to tell me this! What were you doing earlier?"

The little girl, about three or four years old, was holding a yo-yo in her hand. Perhaps her hands were wet from the rain, and the yo-yo rolled out and rolled forward along the zebra crossing.

The little girl stumbled to chase the yo-yo. An off-road vehicle not far away was speeding towards her with its horn honking. Her mother was still on the phone. Xu Zhaixing looked up after replying to WeChat. When he realized what he was doing, someone was already rushing towards him.

It's past.

I only remember that she pushed the little girl aside, and then she felt a severe pain in her waist. Her internal organs seemed to have shifted, and a sweet and fishy smell surged into her throat, and then she lost consciousness.

It is said that before death, the most important people and things will appear in your mind. But at the moment of death, Xu Zhaixing didn't even have time to look back on his life, and he died of pain directly.

The screams of the crowd, the cries of children, and the sharp sound of brakes enveloped this evening after the rain.

…

Xu Zhaixing had a dream.

I dreamed of many years ago, before my mother passed away from esophageal cancer and before my father went bankrupt and had a stroke. She lived an enviable and wealthy life and could pursue her dreams without any worries.

She dreamed of the limited-edition Barbie dolls in her room, the beautiful clothes she made for the dolls herself, and the gold medal from the youth clothing design competition she put on her desk.

She dreamed that she got an offer from the Royal College of Art when she was in her senior year of high school. Just when she was happily preparing to go to university abroad, her mother was diagnosed with advanced esophageal cancer.

His father's venture capital investment failed and he lost more than tens of millions. In the end, he could not even get the money for his mother's medical treatment. At this time, all the relatives who had been friendly to them closed their doors, including Xu, who tricked his father into participating in the venture capital investment.

The second uncle of the family.

Xu's father sold the company's assets to treat his mother's illness, but he gave up going abroad, took the college entrance examination, and was admitted to an art and design university in city B.

But my mother's illness has reached an advanced stage, and no amount of money can save her. My mother passed away, my father went bankrupt, his hair turned gray overnight, and he suffered a stroke and was paralyzed in bed.

That year, Xu Zhaixing had just turned eighteen.

I already had to shoulder all the burdens of my family.

She saw herself struggling to move forward in the quagmire. While her classmates around her were facing love, food, travel and star chasing, she was facing debt collection from creditors, loans from banks, and her father's huge medical expenses.

.

She didn't want to give up her dream of designing, so she was working part-time while going to school, and she felt tired even if she was breathing every day.

In the winter of her freshman year, she came home an hour late because she had to hand in a design assignment. Her father, who was paralyzed in bed, wanted to drink water. When he struggled to get a water glass, he knocked over the boiled water bottle.

By the time Xu Zhaixing returned home, her father had fainted from the pain. He called 120 and was sent to the hospital. The doctor told her that it was a severe burn.

Xu Zhaixing remembered that it snowed that night.

She squatted in the corridor of the hospital, holding a stack of expensive medical bills, covering her face and crying silently.

She couldn't hold on any longer.

She felt so tired.

She took away the fruit-peeling knife used by the aunt in the hospital bed next door and planned to find a deserted place to end her life.

It snowed heavily that night and was extremely cold. She sat on the cold stone steps and pointed the knife at her heart while crying.

Across the street is a building with a huge LED screen.

When the light comes on, the tip of the knife will pierce the heart.

Xu Zhaixing raised his head in the white light and saw the young man on the LED screen.

He was wearing a white sweater, playing the piano, with soft black hair, like a noble and gentle prince, smiling in her direction.

Such a beautiful smile was like a ray of sunshine shining into this dark and cold night, warming her cold and desperate heart.

Humans are really magical creatures. The courage to commit suicide suddenly disappeared. As if she was frightened, she hurriedly dropped the knife in her hand and looked up blankly at the young man playing the piano.

The picture on the LED screen lasted only ten seconds. No one knew what kind of power those ten seconds gave her on this cold and desperate night.

The person playing the piano in the picture is called Cen Feng. He is a newly debuted star, a gentle and smiling boy.

In those days when she couldn't hold on any longer, Cen Feng was the only light in her life.

No matter how difficult the situation is, thinking about him will help you get through it.

With this beam of light, she went through the most difficult period. Although the debt has not been paid off and her father has not recovered, everything is getting better and everything is full of hope.

The fact that she liked Cen Feng made her pale life colorful again.

She hopes that one day she can stand in front of Cen Feng with her work and proudly say to him: Brother, look, I did it.

She wanted to say to him, thank you for showing up, thank you for playing the piano to me, thank you for letting me not give up on myself, thank you for letting me become who I am.

But it turned out that this young man who had given her so much hope had already stepped half into the abyss of death.

How ridiculous.

He screams and yells every day to protect his brother and our baby, but he doesn't even know he has depression.

But he didn't even notice the pain beneath his forced smile.

Still so selfish, drawing strength from his smile and supporting the illusion.

What's even more ridiculous is that after tearing apart this illusion, she couldn't do anything for him except crying and feeling sad.

She would never see Cen Feng again.

The boy she loved with all her life.

…………

…

"Reaching for the stars? Reaching for the stars! Wake up! Oh my God, are you drooling? My novel! Ah, my Yingqi! I'm all wet with your saliva! Get up! Get up!"

There was a buzzing in her ears, and Xu Zhaixing felt her head hit hard, and a fleshy hand slapped her face.

"Xu Zhaixing! Get up! This is a new version! Do you know how long I waited in line to buy it?"

Why does this noisy voice in her ears sound so much like her high school classmate Cheng You?

Xu Zhaixing struggled to open his eyes.

For a moment, the dusk light flooded into my eyes through the glass window of the classroom.

Classmates wearing school uniforms chasing each other, cluttered desks piled with books, and crooked corridors are all strange and familiar at the same time. They are memories from many years ago.
To be continued...