Chapter 1 Toilet incident(1/2)
The war drums are rumbling, and the soldiers are pressing forward.【】
On the enemy platform above the city gate, the general guarding the city was wearing heavy armor and carrying a sword. There was a row of strong soldiers on the left and right, everyone with their bows and arrows drawn, as if they were facing a powerful enemy.
The general who defended the city raised his eyes and glanced at the endless enemy soldiers in front of him with contemptuous eyes. He smiled coldly and looked unconcerned.
"General, there are too many enemy soldiers, can we still defend this city?" a soldier said timidly.
"Fart!" the general who defended the city shouted, and said proudly, "With this general here, how can there be a city that cannot be defended?"
"But if Master Wu arrives, this city will be unable to be defended!"
"Master Wu?" The general guarding the city trembled, his face suddenly turned pale, and he said in fear, "If Master Wu arrives, how can we defend this city... Well, Master Wu will not arrive, no way."
The general who defended the city was extremely frightened. His arrogance had turned into endless trembling, and his worried eyes were scanning the enemy generals in front one by one.
About a stone's throw away from the city gate, there was a black mass of soldiers attacking the city, stretching endlessly, at least hundreds of thousands of people. The general in front of the battle looked up at the tall city wall and sighed, "The city is impregnable, and Lord Wu can't reach it
, even thousands of troops and horses cannot attack..."
Before the siege commander finished speaking, he heard hundreds of thousands of soldiers behind him shouting - "Master Wu is here!"
Suddenly, there was a loud crash, the sound of throwing weapons and armor, and the sound of kneeling and shouting for master.
The siege commander's face was full of joy, and he and hundreds of thousands of soldiers knelt on the ground in unison, respectfully shouting "Master Wu" to the peerless master who stood proudly. The shout was like a thundering bell, deafening.
The peerless expert had a majestic face, turning a blind eye to the hundreds of thousands of saluting soldiers in front of him. With a slight step, he teleported from hundreds of feet away to the city gate. The little finger of his right hand hooked at the general guarding the city, and he closed his
A faint sound came from his lips, "Surrender."
The general who defended the city was shocked, and a row of soldiers beside him fell to the ground in shock and fainted. The soldiers who defended the city opened the city gate spontaneously without waiting for the general's order. Amidst the creaking sound of the door opening, the general who defended the city dropped his sword.
, took off his armor, put his knees together, and jumped directly from the tower over three feet high in a kneeling position.
There was a muffled "plop" sound, and the defender's knees made a big crater on the ground. However, his expression seemed to be without any pain. He panicked and said to the peerless expert in front of him, "Master Wu, the door is opening too slowly. Wu
Don't be offended, Master Wu, please let me go..."
As the general guarding the city spoke, he gestured to the tens of thousands of soldiers who were marching towards the city, and all kowtowed to the peerless master. Bang bang bang bang, there was a burst of sincere kowtows, and smoke and dust rose from the ground.
"Master Wu, Master Wu." The siege general crawled quickly to the peerless master, raised his head and asked, "Master Wu, do you want to kill him or not?"
"kill."
The peerless expert replied indifferently, and the general guarding the city was so frightened that he knocked his head to the ground. The peerless expert smiled approvingly, and then stepped into the city. He only heard a heartbreaking wailing sound, and tens of thousands of soldiers in the city were already gone.
He was completely killed by the peerless master with three blows and two blows.
"Hehehehe!"
The peerless expert walked leisurely among the pool of blood and dead bodies, looking extremely proud, licking his lips and laughing heartily, "Oh yeah!"
Suddenly, the peerless expert felt a pain in his head, as if someone had hit him with a stick, and said angrily, "Who?"
The peerless expert was looking around, but he could only see shadows in front of him, and no one could be seen. Immediately, he felt a strange itching in his armpits. He wanted to avoid it but couldn't move. He said angrily, "Who is it? Who is provoking me?"
?”
"Xiao Wu, don't you know if you open your eyes and take a look?" A voice that sounded like a smile but not a smile sounded in his ears. As if the peerless expert had realized something, the voice suddenly became louder, "Brother Cai is here, let's go to the Internet cafe!
"
"Oh, go quickly!"
The peerless expert was completely awakened by a loud shout in his ears. He stood up suddenly and rubbed his eyes. He saw his buddy Wang Xicai holding a cigarette in his mouth and a billiard cue in his hand, looking at him with a mocking face.
"Wu Xindie, did you sleep well this time?" Wang Xicai blew out a puff of smoke and said teasingly, "I heard you calling me "Master" in your dream, who did you call "Master"?
"Why did I fall asleep?"
After waking up, Wu Xindie stretched out and saw that all the billiard tables next to her were free. She felt relieved and said seriously, "Brother Cai, it's not me who calls other people "Master", but others who call me "Master!" Thousands of troops and thousands of horses are shouting
My father, I can’t even call him by his name.”
"Haha. You are so crazy about lust, it's easy to go crazy." Wang Xicai looked concerned and asked with a smile, "You were dreaming and others called you father, and now you call me brother. You are not used to this title."
?”
"I'm used to it. How can I not get used to it? I only slept for ten minutes this time. Thousands of troops called me Lord, and it only lasted ten minutes. How long have I called you Brother Cai? It's been more than ten years at least.
Right? Well, it’s more practical to call you Brother Cai.”
Wu Xindie was duplicity and sighed inwardly. From being called "grandfather" to being called "brother" by others, there was such a huge difference in status, and he really didn't feel comfortable with it.
"Brother Cai, do you still have cigarettes?" Wu Xindie dug into her empty pocket and said sadly, "I have no cigarettes, please give me one."
"Damn it, when have you ever smoked? You either don't have cigarettes or you don't have fire. As a smoker, without cigarettes or fire, it's like a netizen without a computer and no network cable!" Wang Xicai accused him seriously, and suddenly said with a bad smile,
"I don't have any more cigarettes. I just threw away the cigarette case. I still have a thick one on me. Do you want to smoke?"
"hehe."
Wu Xindie grinned, and suddenly she felt furious. She thought about how she had killed countless people in her sleep and swallowed up thousands of miles like a tiger. How awesome she was! Being disturbed by him inexplicably using a billiard cue and his dirty hands, she already felt very tragic. Just now
When I woke up, I was disgusted by him again. I was really angry and cursed secretly, "Damn you, you always get mad at me! If I can beat you, I won't beat you lightly!"
Wu Xindie was furious in her heart, but she had a smile on her face. She smiled and said, "The cigarette you are wearing is a women's cigarette. I don't smoke it."
"Hehehehe!"
Wang Xicai laughed loudly. Seeing how pitiful he was, he handed over the half-remaining cigarette and said compassionately, "Smoke it."
Wu Xindie was addicted to cigarettes, so she could only put down her identity, took the remaining half of the cigarette, and immediately took a few deep puffs of dirty cigarettes. Quan thought it was revenge for his disrespect for her. Suddenly she dropped the cigarette butt, stood up, and left
He raised his legs vigorously, flicked his toes in front of him, and then opened his arms to the left and right, hitting each other with the palms and fists of his hands several times, making a few crisp crackling sounds, and Wu Xindie shouted: "Shadowless Kick!"
Before the shouting stopped, Wu Xindie sprinted a few steps and suddenly jumped up and kicked out.
Wu Xindie's kick was like a kick but not a kick, like a kick but not a kick, and her movement was extremely clumsy. Every move from raising her legs to taking out her feet was like a clown performing acrobatics or a magician pretending to be a ghost.
.
"Brother Cai." Wu Xindie showed her hand and said slightly proudly, "I raised my left leg just now and it was called 'Ye Jia Kick'. I switched my hands and struck. What kind of punch is this move called?"
"It's the 'Kasyapa Kick' and the 'Kanda Fist'!" Wang Xicai corrected him and laughed, "You watched people playing Swordsman 2 in the Internet cafe this noon. After watching it for so long, you can't even remember these two moves! You
Look, what are you hitting? Isn’t this just a pretense?”
"I'm just practicing." Wu Xindie denied that she was pretending, looked at the sun, and said: "It's time for me to get off work. The No. 1 online gaming cafe opened today. There were only a few people at noon, but there may be more people now.
Come on. Let’s go play for a while.”
Wu Xindie is 22 years old. Her job is to play billiards in the billiard court. She loves online games. However, her income is meager and she cannot afford a computer. When she wants to play online games, she goes to a small Internet cafe to play for an hour or two, sometimes even just standing there.
I was just watching others playing and drawing cakes to satisfy my hunger. The set of fists and kicks I just used were learned from "Swordsman Love 2" when I was drawing cakes to satisfy my hunger at noon.
The two of them rushed to the largest Internet cafe in the town. This Internet cafe was large in scale and the owner was a recently graduated college student named Huang Xiaofeng. Huang Xiaofeng was also an avid online game enthusiast and had a great sense of accomplishment in starting the Internet cafe.
, overjoyed, he personally named the Internet cafe, calling it "The No. 1 Online Gaming Internet Cafe in Phoenix Town"
Wu Xindie and Wang Xicai came to the Internet cafe and saw that there were only a few people surfing the Internet in the huge Internet cafe. They were very interested and immediately tried the computer.
After playing a few cigarettes, Wang Xicai was very happy and exclaimed as he clicked the keys: "This is the first time that a man has played with such a high-end computer. It's so cool to play games on this kind of computer!" Wu Xindie said.
She said with joy, "If I had so many high-end computers, I would be willing to sell my kidneys!"
"Two friends." When the boss Huang Xiaofeng heard someone praising his machine for being so good that he was selling his kidney, he walked over with a smile and smiled at Wu Xindie, "To open such an Internet cafe, you have to sell your body.
That’s enough, no need to sell your kidney. Haha!”
"Really? Hehehe—" Wu Xindie smiled awkwardly, her face actually turning a little red.
"Brother, I was just joking, don't be shy!" Huang Xiaofeng smiled and asked friendly, "Do you like playing online games?"
"Of course! I'm an old player, and I'm a hardcore player." Wu Xindie said with great enthusiasm.
"I'm an old gamer! I bought a computer just to play games, and I plan to play games for a lifetime!" Wang Xicai showed off, squinting at Wu Xindie, feeling disgusted that he called himself an old man without even having a computer.
Players even brought ashes with them.
"Haha! The saying "game life" is so well said!" Huang Xiaofeng pulled up a chair and sat down, saying proudly, "To be honest, I opened this Internet cafe just to develop the game business."
"Oh?" Wu Xindie and Wang Xicai were shocked, "Are you the owner of this Internet cafe?"
"Yes." Huang Xiaofeng nodded, a hint of unnoticeable melancholy suddenly flashed in his eyes.
"Boss Huang, the machines in your Internet cafe are so good and the Internet fee is not high. Why don't there seem to be too many people surfing the Internet?" Wang Xicai couldn't bear to see that more than half of the machines in the lobby were idle. It was not as busy as he imagined.
I have this question.
"I'm also looking for the reason, hey." Huang Xiaofeng sighed leisurely.
"Boss Huang." Wu Xindie opened her seat and faced Huang Xiaofeng, "Your Internet cafe opened today. Have you held any activities?"
"Activities?" Huang Xiaofeng was stunned, "There haven't been any activities."
"It's no wonder. When you open such a big Internet cafe, you need to organize some activities." Wu Xindie saw that he was listening seriously, and further said, "Carry out some activities, not big or small, to let everyone recognize your Internet cafe.
Then your business will be booming!"
"I'm still the boss, why did I neglect this point!" Huang Xiaofeng suddenly realized and said happily, "Brother, what kind of activities do you think would be most effective? As long as it works, it doesn't matter how much you spend."
"I would like to ask you to set up a stage at the entrance of the Internet cafe and find some beautiful women to sing." Wang Xicai suggested.
"Singing? It's too vulgar." Wu Xindie pondered for a moment, then asked with a smile, "Boss Huang, do you like chess?"
To be continued...